For me, today, my natural proclivity was my beard. I am growing it out for a wedding in November, per the groom's request (it is known as a Sympathy Beard). I have been letting it grow without trim since early September with great success. Emily has pointed out that it's on the verge of being pony tail material. It's thick and luxurious. I figured I should investigate whether or not there is any sort of beard competition. I might place!
No, I won't.
There is a beard competition. It's called the World Beard and Moustache Championships, and there are some manly beards battling for the title.
Look at this man. This is a man.
This is Jack Passion, the World Beard Champion ("first place in the full beard natural category, the most competitive category of all", according to World Beard Championships). Compared to this man, my beard is bush league. This man is a real man, and a real beardsman.
I will say that length should not be all that counts in a beard. I submit the following criteria for beard judging. Please submit your own.
- Thickness
- Fullness
- Softness (softer = better)
- Style (a manicured beard is no beard at all)
- Shapeliness
- Luxury
- Manliness
- How many bits of churro can you fit in there
This reminds me!!! Zach's sister is friends with someone who came in fourth internationally in one of these categories! FOR REAL. She just happened to be discussing it with us yesterday. I couldn't believe it.
ReplyDeleteIt is a SOLIDARITY BEARD. GET IT RIGHT. I don't need no sympathy, least of all from you!
ReplyDeleteI totally read this as "World Bear Championships" and was a teensy bit disappointed, I won't lie. But kudos on your commitment to the facial shrubbery! It is masterful.
ReplyDelete